A Kris Jenner-Themed Birthday Party

Grab your pantsuits, dolls!

For Kris’ birthday, we threw her a Kris Jenner-themed dinner party. All guests were required to dress as their favorite version of Kris Jenner. I was the only grandchild in attendance because I’m the only one that calls her, Kris. Those other kids call her “Lovey”, which I find degrading. But, I digress.

I have a different relationship with her. It’s more manager/client (sometimes coworker) vibes, and less of a grandchild/grandmother thing.

Basically, I’ll call her “Lovey” when she stops taking 10% from me.

For my look, I went with the signature Kris Jenner pantsuit. Be it a meeting or the Met Gala, one thing about it, Kris Jenner is gonna wear a pantsuit. It’s like she and Vice President Kamala Harris share a closet.

Her obsession even bled into Halloween one year. She dressed like Jack Skellington (The Nightmare Before Christmas) just because a 2-button pinstripe pantsuit was the costume.

Transforming into Kris Jenner showed me just how good I look in a pixie cut. I absolutely ate. If it wasn’t for my dedication to my brand and my unwillingness to manage anyone in this family, I could easily come for Kris.

In addition to dressing up, we played a fun Kris Jenner-themed game at dinner. We went around the table and each of us had to pretend to be Kris and say who our favorite child was. Everyone was pretty predictable with their answers. A lot of people said, Mommy or Auntie Kylie. But, I shook things up and said, Brody.

I was bored, so I ruined dinner.