Season 6!
How did this happen?
Season 6! Can you believe it?
No, really—can you? Because these episodes have been so bad, I need to know who at Hulu keeps approving more seasons.
The episode kicks off with the family shooting a new opening sequence in Malibu. Everyone showed up—except Auntie Kylie, of course. She claimed it didn’t work with her schedule.
North’s Thoughts: That’s cute. I had her pay docked. You don’t work, you don’t get paid—it’s that simple. Just ask the Malikas.
Probably because the producers forced them, everyone started announcing what they have going on this year. I’m sure they immediately regretted asking.
Spoiler alert… nobody wants to works these days. You’re going to die when you hear what Auntie Kourtney has planned.
Kris Jenner’s To-Do List:
✔️ Spend more time with her grandkids
✔️ Stress less
✔️ Eat better
I think Kris should add “Get Corey a job application”.
Meanwhile, Mommy rattled off her plans: a White House visit, new SKIMS collabs, and her Ryan Murphy show. Nobody reacted to Ms. “I’m so booked and busy” so she immediately pivoted to complaining about being my manager so she could get the attention she so desperately craves. Classic.
She has to drop everything when I have a photoshoot? Not the woman who begged me to go to the Met with her because she needed me to hype up her beachy outfit.
Yes, I invite Mommy to shoots—but that’s because I’m trying to help her network. She’s the one that has to peddle these little bras and panties, not me.
I’m not bringing her around anymore, since it’s such an issue.
Good luck selling your knock-off SPANX without my contacts.
Auntie Khloé announced she’s turning 40 this year. She believes this will be her decade. She also wants to find her “forever person.”
Forever person? In this family?
Let’s consult my notes:
Kris: Divorced twice. Dating a jobless man.
Auntie Kourtney: 3 kids by a jobless man. Married Travis Barker. (Forever person? It’s too soon to call it.)
Mommy: Divorced three times. Got desperate and dated Pete Davidson. 3 misbehaved children.
Auntie Kendall: Dating history looks like the NBA All-Star weekend. Childless
Auntie Kylie: Co-parenting (single parent). In a bizarre situationship with Timothée Chalamet.
Rob: Do I even need to explain this one?
And Auntie Khloé still believes in “forever”?
Bless her heart.
Meanwhile, Auntie Kendall and Auntie Kylie are going to Vegas and doing fashion stuff in Paris.
Auntie Kourtney announced she takes two walks a day.
Get these people off the show.
